Max’s Upcoming Xmas in Jail

NOTE: The following post was written (duh, obviously) a long time ago but was never posted. I thought I’d toss this in just in case anybody still follows Max’s adventures.


The Malt will be spending Xmas in jail.

Meanwhile, the Alpha Japanese Female (AJF) and I will be in Tokyo, supping on fine sushi, nibbling seasonal Japanese delicacies and quaffing decent sake.

Dog GIF Really

As you might imagine, Max thinks he is getting the short end of the fetching stick.

Not that he will suffer; his accommodations will be at his Vet’s office where he’ll get tons of affection and attention.

That’s as it should be. His medical treatments over the past months have provided for a very prosperous year. He’s Santa Dog, the gift that keeps giving.

Here’s a quick doggie update for the unfortunate three of you who actually read this silly blog and don’t just skim the photos:

After a tough summer and autumn, the Pupski’s paws finally healed. Wow, was that an ordeal, more for him than us but along the way we all took a turn in the Pit ‘O Misery – dilly dilly.

The new Vet was brilliant in his diagnosis and treatment. Max was weaned from the debilitating steroids the former Vet used in lieu of discovering and addressing the real problem of demodex mites.

The new medicines killed all the little mite bastards and once their small, stinking, fecal-filled and rotted corpses (let me know if I’m getting too graphic) were flushed from his hair follicles, the Malt recovered slowly but surely.

Along with the elimination of the mites came a big increase in Max’s energy. Without those nasty drugs he has lost quite a bit of weight and is more active, playful and just generally more youthful than before.

Best of all is that his new anti-itchy medicine (Cytopoint injections) has worked spectacularly well at making him comfortable despite his allergies.

But then arose a new crisis. The Vet concluded that Max had several teeth that needed to be removed. Some of the problem toofers were likely congenital issues but some were due to cracked teeth which allowed small abscesses to form at the root level.

In full disclosure, some of Floofer’s dental problems were probably due to negligence on our part. We were rightfully scolded for not being the most diligent of dog tooth brushers. Although his teeth looked white there was evidence of periodontal disease which might have been avoided had we done a better job as owners.

The Fluff did not seem to be in pain but we learned that doggers will often mask mouth problems because showing any distress in that area would make them appear weak in the eyes of the pack, a bad thing back in the day.

Hippie Dog

Righteous drugs, man.

So our favorite white dog just underwent six extractions. As I write this he is on the floor under my desk, eyes crossed, groovin’ on the fine pharmaceuticals prescribed to him.

His prognosis is excellent and we hope that this resolves the last of Max’s outstanding health problems.

All told, this year we shelled out about $3k on the Pupperoni’s medical expenses.

Even as I write that it seems hard to believe and it stings more knowing a fair sum of that total came from chasing treatments that never had a chance of working.

Thanks a whole bunch Doctor I-Hope-You-Get-Demodex-Mites-in-Your-Armpits.

OK, so I’m a little bitter.

Some folks think we’re crazy to have laid out so much cash – what? on an animal! – but we don’t regret it in the least. He’s a family member.

We love the little dog (who we now call “Gummy”) and, fortunately, we are in a position that we can take care of him and, hey, those kids don’t need an inheritance anyway.


Sorry kids, we spent it all on the dog.

We tried to tell Max how lucky he is but he keeps bringing up the Tokyo trip and moaning about being “abandoned” over Christmas.

Oh yeah, the Tokyo trip. Sorry, I digressed a bit.

It all started when a family squabble broke out about where to gather for Christmas dinner. Thanksgiving was a contested event but peace finally broke out. We weren’t thrilled at the idea of another bicker fest.

From our perspective, the only certainty was that the Big Feed would not be at our house – I mean, a major advantage of retired living is to freeload off the kids, amirite?

We envisioned sitting peacefully at one of the Chateau de la Spawn playing with the grandchildren, sipping wine, getting tipsy and nodding off during TV sports shows only to be gently woken in time for a fine dining experience.

In return, we promised to smile absent-mindedly from time to time, silently pass gas and forget the in-laws’ names like sweet old people are supposed to do during holiday gatherings.

When it appeared that no consensus was forming on a Christmas venue and the debate was devolving into an internicine battle of snipes, the AJF and I decided we’d simply eschew the tussle and, instead, treat ourselves to a jaunt to Japan. Take it from me, Christmas is a truly magical time of year in Tokyo.

Selfish? Of course. Neener, neener, neener. The kids will manage fine. We’ll dote on the grands at New Years and, besides, we’ll be leaving everyone some nice presents for Christmas morning. If we can’t earn their affection, we’ll buy it.

Sadly, we can not take Mr. Maxwell the Maltese along with us even though he would be an improvement over many of the typical passengers on that 12 hour flight. For one, his legs are too short to kick the seat back.

Anyway, he’s quite miffed about being boarded and it’s going to take a lot of apologies to regain his good graces when we return.


Maybe we’ll bring Gummy a nice souvenir and some soft Japanese treats.

26 replies

    • He’s doing great and looking good! Gummy may be willing to forgive (uncertain) but he has not forgotten and gives us the hairy eyeball any time we prepare to leave the house without first putting him in his harness.

      Liked by 1 person

    • First I must give you props for naming a dog “Dobby.” That’s, uh, precious as no doubt you’ve heard a million times. It sure, uh, rings a bell. Dad jokes aside, the whole mite thing was a major pain in le derrière and I don’t mean that clandestine restaurant in the heart of the Marais. Christmas in Tokyo is simply surreal but great fun.

      Liked by 2 people

  1. I read your other post first… I do everything backwards!
    Delighted to hear max has improved. He has been through an awful ordeal, the poor little guy.

    I completely understand you not hestitating to pay for whatever treatment he needs. We only had poppy a week when we found out about her heart defect and spent A LOT of money on life saving surgery. She continues to be worth every cent and then some.

    So happy you found a vet that really knows what they are doing. That is such a help.

    So… yes I love following Max’s adventures and have missed the little guy… more! More! More!
    K x

    Liked by 2 people

    • I hear this has been a rough winter in Ireland. How have you and the pups managed so far? We thought of you when we heard that there was a heavy snowfall and reckoned you’d have to put bright bows on the pooches so they didn’t disappear in the snow whilst on walks.

      Liked by 1 person

      • Yes we’ve been snowed in! Of course Poppy loves the snow and it is a struggle to get her come back inside once she’s out… we took a video of her trying to catch snowballs which was hilarious! She just couldn’t figure out why they kept disappearing. Lily, on the other hand, hates it. She opts to cross her legs rather than go outside for the loo. It’s starting to thaw now, which is a relief.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I have missed you guys! Reading email from my phone, all that showed was “Max’s Upcoming Xmas in J” Of course, I thought, ‘How cool! Max went to Japan!” I see. You did. He did not. Poor little guy. Gosh, while I am glad his medical condition cleared up, what a long strange trip it was. So happy he is back to his adorable little self. Gummy….. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • I way behind on catching up on your blog, Lois but will be doing some “binge” reading to get back to speed. Max’s medical condition is just fine and I hope that the same can be said about a certain photographer and her cats. The Fluffpup would have been a big hit in Japan and I would have taken him to a maid cafe and I could play wingman as they fawned over him. Pick up the scraps so to speak. Well, maybe not.

      Liked by 2 people

  3. So glad he has recovered from the mites of doom…… do the Japanese do good false teeth for dogs? You could take an impression with you.
    And yes, I would far prefer him as a fellow traveler….. oops, I will never be allowed into the U. S. A. after that remark…

    Liked by 2 people

    • I would not be surprised to find that the Japanese do indeed produce false teeth for dogs. Probably 3D printed with small microcircuits from Sony. There are a number of places in Tokyo dedicated to showcasing Japan’s technology and future concepts and I like to visit them when there – fascinating stuff with heavy emphasis on robotics which is how the Japanese plan to deal with a national demographic that is tilting to the aged without enough young’uns to provide support.

      I don’t know about taking an impression with me. Although I do a good impression of Max: “Feed me, feed me, feed me.” (snorf, snorf)

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Yay, I’m glad Max finally recovered from the foot problems…but now his teeth. Poor guy, what an ordeal.
    Tell him he reached his limit for health problems and that now it’s time to begin a new healthy, fun, lots-of-walks-in-the-park chapter with mom and dad. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hey! Everybody loves fruit cakes. They just keep passing them around every year and they last forever! Just remember: December 27 is National Fruit Cake Day and January 3 is National Fruit Cake Toss Day. When is National Parrot Day? Hahahaha…there is no such day. Neener, neener, neener.


  5. How fun to be able to Christmas outside the states. I can only imagine how visually arresting it was especially after seeing your menu post (I’m reading older posts first to catch up now-my bad). So happy to hear Max is fully recovered from a bad diagnosis and from his dental work. Canine periodontal issues are more common than you can imagine, so don’t beat yourself up. Besides, that’s Max’s job. Oh and for the record, you may have dropped out of sight for an extended time yet I note you had more visitors and comments than I regularly do and I work the blog like a maniac! Actually I’m thrilled for you, it just reaffirms that you’re doing something quite clever here and I have at least have the good sense to follow you even if not nearly the following. ☺️ Welcome back!

    Liked by 2 people

    • It was not easy for us to forego the opportunity to get together with family over Christmas but in the end it turned out fine and we had a good time later on. Sheesh – sometimes these holidays become such a dramatic production when they are really at their best (imho) when kept simple. I think I’ll celebrate the next holiday (St. Patrick’s Day), with Max and a cold brewski and Max’s presence will be optional.

      Liked by 1 person

  6. Pleased to hear Max is on the mend, because Max is a sort of super canine and is loved world-wide. Quite a few people seem to escape Christmas tensions by going away. I wouldn’t miss Christmas with my extended family for anything though. I only see them once a year but always memorable.
    Best wishes,

    Liked by 1 person

    • His Lord Furriness will be pleased to learn he is a “super canine.” He gets called worse fairly often but somehow always worms his way back into our good graces. I think your family is much bigger than mine so get-togethers with the whole clan are probably rarer. There are few of us and we are now all pretty close-by so maybe we don’t feel that same urgency to jump on every chance to flock. Or maybe we’re just grouchy old buzzards which is probably the more likely bet.

      Liked by 1 person

      • My Dad was one of seven and now that my grandmother passed on almost 10 years ago, we don’t see that much of each other and the next generation has scattered and has quite an age range. However, for most of us, that big family Christmas is revered. I don’t know anything else.


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