This Halloween, Max is dressing as a virus. It reflects his infectious personality. :snorf:
I made the Malt’s costume all by myself which accounts for how truly terrible it is. See, among my many other shortcomings, I don’t know how to sew. Mock me if you must.
It was a learning experience. For example, did you know that it is not necessary to tie knots after each stitch? Do you think that many people know that? It’s much faster if you don’t do it.
I used a child’s tee shirt, a ball of weird, red yarn and colored markers to create this masterpiece. All from Amazon; all for maybe $8 tops. Plus my labor which almost impossible to undervalue.
The AJF proclaimed the entire exercise as “absolutely ridiculous” but Max has a long and rich tradition of wearing poorly chosen, badly made and generally disappointing costumes. Why change when you are on a streak?
It was hard deciding what costume he would wear. I wanted something topical. No witches, werewolves, Disney characters or the usual possibilities.
There were several options available; Max wanted “none of the above.” The AJF nixed some of my better ideas on the thin grounds that they were – what was her description? – oh yes, “tasteless and offensive to normal people.”
Still, I think he would have made a great Dr. Fauci if I ruffled his head fur and added a pair of glasses.
I tried to make the costume scientifically accurate. You’ll no doubt appreciate my careful placement of the red spike proteins and nucleoproteins which govern virus replication. Or maybe not. The neighbor’s kid didn’t appreciate the effort. He saw Max and asked “what is he supposed to be – the measles?”
Sadly, The FurMeister will not be going out to trick or treat this year. We’re hunkering down but he will get a treat or several.
Unlike the silly dog costume, the real virus is serious stuff. Stay safe out there, friends.
Oh yeah, and teach your kids how to sew.
PS: Yes, I could have made mention about things that flu right by me or how this post could go viral or a thousand other bad puns but I restrained myself. What might show up in the comment section is another matter altogether. Beware.
PPS: I tried out my Halloween joke on the AJF: why do boy ghosts like girl ghosts? BOObs!!!!! The joke was a total failure, much like Max’s costume.
Categories: The Dog From Rancho Cucaracha