Happiness is an AI Bark Collar

Is your dog happy?

I mean, really happy? Do you know? Can you tell for sure?

Well, no need to sweat that question any further! Thanks to some smart South Koreans who really care, we now have an electronic, artificial intelligence device that compares your dog’s bark to a database of over 10,000 other barks and determines if your dog is happy or not.

“I’m happiest when you take me to the park!”

I can’t embed the video so click here for the original story: https://miami.cbslocal.com/2021/01/13/ai-powered-dog-collar-translates-barks-into-emotions/

The local CBS affiliate in Miami reports:

“The South Korean company (Petpulls) says its algorithm can determine a dog’s five emotional states: happy, relaxed, anxious, angry, or sad. The more barking data they get, the more accurate the results.”

I know, I know…where was this wondrous device at Xmas time when we were flush with spending money? Well, it’s here now, just in time to suck up some of that excess stimulus money that our fine politicians have so generously been throwing in our direction.

From the Petpuls website.

If you don’t believe me when I say this is a game changer, listen to testimonial of this nice Korean lady talking about her Border Collie, Godot:

“The Petpuls smart collar is giving six-year-old Godot a new voice to tell people how she feels. Godot’s owner, Moon Sae-Mi, says the device revealed the Border Collie gets angry when she loses a game but feels safe at home even when she’s alone.”

An overdue product! Only fair that this time around Godot was the one waiting, eh? :snorf: And while we are on the topic, who names a female dog Godot?

Being a Border Collie, Godot could probably have reprogrammed the game. She would have used Linux no doubt. (That’s a techie pun that absolutely no one will get but it amused me and that’s what counts.)

Coincidence that a barking device features Maltese in their Family Album? I think not.

And fear not, Cat-O-Philes! There is a similar product for the kitties. It’s called “MeowTalk.” Again, I don’t make this stuff up.

“U.S. company Akvelon developed similar technology to translate a cat’s meow. MeowTalk is an app that helps owners better understand their feline friends.”

Seems a waste of time and money. We already know that all cats do is grumble, complain and criticize. You don’t need an app to tell you that.

Oh, by the way, these things go for about $99 each. Who said you can’t buy happiness?

71 replies

    • OK, for those who want to understand the pun and there are at least two of you…”Godot,” aside from the well known reference “Waiting for Godot” (a play by Samuel Beckett) is also the name of a popular computer game engine – the programs and tools used to develop computer games. So the Border Collie, “Godot,” could have used Godot to…oh, you got it by now.

      PS: I heard the Bitey Dog crew is a huge social media user.

      Like

  1. Good grief! Apparently manufacturers are keenly aware that they can sell anything to a pet owner if they claim it will make your “Fluffy’ happy.

    Tom, you have entirely too much time on your hands. 🤗 My sweet girl Murphy has never had any difficulty letting me know how she feels.

    Barking: protecting me because someone dared to walk past our house

    Wants a treat: puts her head in my lap, stares at me, and drools all over my lap

    Frightened: barks and runs around from window to window

    Pissed off: asks to go out by staring at the door. Then proceeds to sniff every freakin blade of grass in the yard and goes back inside having ‘done’ nothing because she knows it pisses ME off

    Upset: whines pathetically until she gets a belly rub

    Think we’ll pass on this one!
    Ginger

    Liked by 3 people

    • I recognize that “pissed off” signal of staring at the door and then not producing when let out. Dogs are masters of passive-aggressive resistance. Also skilled beggars and whiners!

      Like

  2. Who knew animals have feelings? 😜I don’t really see the point. Unless they’re feeling love and gratitude, keep it to yourself. I have always chosen my pound dogs on the basis of how quiet they are. Who wants a yappy dog? I know that when my dogs are too content to incessantly bark, we’re good. And I agree with you on cats.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Since they built a house across the road mine do a fair bit of barking….often in the wee hours of the morning when cars and motorbikes make short and furtive journeys to the house. Can’t make up my mind whether it is a brothel for premature ejaculators or a point for the exchange of substances not approved by the authorities.
    So I know that bark, and all the others. They need no help in expressing themselves….

    Liked by 2 people

  4. I grew up with Linux and the Peanuts gang! (Actually, I grew up with a bunch of nerds who used Linux.)

    Geordie skipped normal dog body language cues and went straight for English. Around here if you mention his name, folks will exclaim, “Oh, you mean the talking dog!” Skip the Babel Fish collar and just get a terrier. He will tell you his opinion on far more subjects than you would think he had one.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Were it a Scottish terrier I’d have no doubt. They never shut up and such an accent! Just look at some of the posts below. I mean…never mind. Points deducted for the Linux pun. Back under the bed with you, Toby. Oh, and your problem is that you bought the Babel Fish collar – you need the babel Dog version, duh.

      Liked by 2 people

  5. Is that a shorn OES in the lineup? I’m sure his bark says “I’m starving, woman…where’s my dinner?” Woof, woof. Don’t need a $99 LINUX created toy to tell me what my ex use to utter if he was feeling brave (before the Kraken woke up to his nonsense). 😈

    Liked by 2 people

  6. Koreans developing a gadget that lets you know how dogs feel?
    What sort of twisted brain develops AI for dog barks?
    Just proffer a biscuit and see the result.
    Korean dogs, and cats, are just happy the brutes don’t eat them!

    A dog wagging its tail is happy.
    A dog snarling, exposing teeth and biting your leg is somewhat upset.

    A cat meanwhile is easier to handle, just do what it says and you live.

    Liked by 4 people

    • Yeah, the irony wasn’t lost on me either – the notion of Koreans caring about dog emotions. While dog esting in South Korea is no longer mainstream it is still to be found, especially in the smaller rural towns. So I imagine the first things the researchers discovered with the bark collar were dogs screaming, “Please don’t put me into the pot.”

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Bruce tells Nox to use her words and Nox does try. She howls and barks. I am afraid if we got something that translated Nox’s barks and howls, it would always say “Treats! Treats! Treats!”

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah, a barkless dog. That always amazes me. Basenjis seem to be very interesting guys with lots of personality traits of their own. Hope we’ll get to learn a lot more about Max and his life in the wine country!

      Liked by 2 people

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