MaxMax Visits Chinatown

Honolulu’s Chinatown is one of the oldest Chinatowns in the United States and it has an interesting history. The AJF and Malt thought a ramble through Tánxiāngshān (the area’s Chinese name meaning “Sandalwood Mountain”) would be interesting, so off we went. In ancient times, before there was a town called […]

He Gets No Respect

Our favorite Malt has been complaining of late that he does not receive the respect to which he believes he is entitled by the accident of his birth. The problem is that he has been condemned to a short stint in the Cone of Shame due to excessive ear scratching […]

Max Visits The Queen

The majestic cruise ship Queen Victoria arrived for a one day port call in Honolulu enroute to the South Pacific and a continuation of its around the world voyage. Max and I invited the Alpha Japanese Female (AJF) to join us on a walk down by the docks to take […]

Max Visits Sandy’s

To get to Sandy’s we first have to get past the lady parts. See, the road from Honolulu to the popular bodysurfing beach known as Sandy’s takes us past Koko Head Crater, a dramatic volcanic tuff cone whose name in Hawaiian is Kohelepelepe which means, uh, cough, “labia minora.” In […]

Max the Catfish

Urban Dictionary: A catfish is someone who pretends to be someone they’re not using Facebook or other social media to create false identities, particularly to pursue deceptive online romances. Example:”Did you hear how Dave got totally catfished last month?! The fox he thought he was talking to turned out to […]

Bruce, I Feel Your Pain

Again the Fates conspired to mock what little dignity remains in my life. Here’s what happened: The Alpha Japanese Female (AJF) was scheduled for one of those regular check ups of female plumbing parts about which we males know little and want to know even less. It was gynecology time, […]

Max Visits The Pali

In Hawaiian, pali means any steep slope or cliff but when folks on Oahu talk about the Pali they refer to a very specific spot, a small saddle of land on the crest of the Ko’olau mountain range that separates the eastern, windward coast from the rest of the island. The […]

Ornery Cuss?

You’ve probably seen the GoDaddy ad that was prepared for the Super Bowl but got pulled after folks went ballistic. If you missed it, here’s a look: I have to admit, not without some shame, that I laughed when I first watched it. What struck me funny was the spot […]

Max Reflects on Kalaupapa

Sun, fun, a mai-tai. Some hula, perhaps a coconut, and grass skirts. And leprosy. What? Where did that last one come from? Settle in kids and let’s talk about a lesser known part of Hawaii’s history. No one knows when, or precisely how, leprosy arrived in the Hawaiian Islands, but […]